Men & Better Sex
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Many men have emotional and physical issues relating to sex and desire and the quicker they can be identified and addressed, the quicker you can get more out of your life and relationships. Some problems are complex, and others are simple problems that cause more distress and issues than they should.
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Sexual Performance Issues – this is not just about treating erectile dysfunction and performance issues, but also about dealing with the inner emotional issues that can contribute to performance issues, fostering healthy sexual and intimacy relationships and preventing sexual issues from arising.
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Having problems getting or maintaining an erection can create a great deal of stress. If you’ve had erectile difficulties, the odds are that you started approaching each sexual interaction with a fear that you will have problems with your erection again. It often creates a self-fulfilling cycle making the situation worse.
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There are several causes to ED, I offer a holistic approach looking at the issues through various lenses.
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Connecting with Your Partner – Sex is not something that everyone “knows how to do perfectly” or has a natural talent for - some are more naturally comfortable with their sexuality than others. We learn and get better at sex with openness and communication from our sexual partners.
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The Construction of Male Sexuality - For men in heterosexual relationships, there still exists many myths and misinformation. Society and mainstream culture has presented an 'image' of what sexuality is, and it is driven from an early age. However, this “narrative” of what sexuality is, is highly distorted.Many women do not understand the pressure that many of their male partners experience in the bedroom. Many men and women still expect the man to be the initiators and leaders in a sexual interaction,
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supposed to stay hard enough, last long enough, and perform well enough. All of this pressure and expectation can leave you feeling distracted and disconnected during sex and often being blamed that you’re not present during sex. More and more younger men are experiencing low desire discrepancy compared to their female counterpart which in turn can cause distress and also masculine expectations placed on them and the narrative they are trying to alighn themselves with.
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I can help to sort sexual fact from fiction and help you understand the truth about female and male sexuality as distinct from the hyper-eroticized and over-fantasized view presented, especially in pornography and to explore and define who is your authentic sexual self (versus what media and porn teach) and how to express it naturally.
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Understanding Sex Helps Improve Sex With Your Partner – We all want to satisfy our partners, and when you understand your partners physical form you will become more confident in your approach to pleasuring your partner. I can offer a road map to your partners body and enable you to explore in a safe environment about the female form.
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Sex is a Big Part of a Defining Masculinity – sex needs to find its place in the life of a man. When a man is sexually confident and satisfied, many other problems (financially, mentally, spiritually) can be brought into perspective, fixed, or avoided. If sex is a big part of your life it is better to create a healthy sex life to enable you to get the rest of your life together.
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Sexual Negatives – There is healthy sex and there is unhealthy sex; both a negativity and positivity that need to be kept in balance. “Everything in moderation” – even sex! Pornography and unhealthy sexual obsessions can quickly overtake a person and can act as an unhealthy distraction from our partners. I can help you to understand the powerfulness of using pornography when used positively but also when used destructively.
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Men Hurt Too - Emotional and Sexual Trauma – past experiences form who we are and how we behave in the present. Men are much more emotional than popular culture would have us believe. Men get hurt emotionally often, even if they don’t show it. These emotional scars build who the man is and how they react to other emotional situations. Sex is an intense emotional situation – and many of a man’s behaviours during sex are the direct result of past experiences (whether its realised or not). Dealing with the past and understanding how the trauma impacts on current sexual relationships enables you to function healthily in sexual/emotional situations.
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Healing from a Cheating Partner - The feeling of a betrayal by a partner is one of the most common forms of sexual and emotional trauma in both men and women. Cheating and infidelity can cause emotional and mental problems that linger for a lifetime if not worked through. Understanding and acceptance are both ways of healing and moving forward to get to a healthier place.
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